Tickle The Infinite Possibilites Within

There are benefits from existing in a meditative state of being. When we meditate we are in a restful and peaceful state of mind. We have a gentle awareness. In its essence, meditation is being aware of the present moment. Through meditation we seek to fully experience each moment. This can be hard to affect.  Much of the time our attention is invested in our passions about the past or our expectations of the future. What we experience and learn in life is very compelling. Our minds give a sense of reality to our feelings about past and future events. With practice the mind can become more focused on the present. 

The mind is constantly drifting in and out of awareness. At one time most clocks made a ticking sound. You would probably notice the ticking as you walked into the room. If you sit down and start to read a book, your attention becomes focused on the content. You no longer experience the sound. When you stop reading, you will begin to notice things again. Perhaps you may now hear the sound of that very same clock, ticking away. Our reality is closely tied to our awareness and our feelings. 

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There is a part of all of us, that simply notices all things. It does not judge and does not get distracted. It is the observer in you. It is a place of restful awareness. It is the part of all of us that is in balance. Deepak Chopra teaches mindful meditation as a process of spiritual, physical and mental health. He suggests that we can step back and look at ourselves in a more conscious manner. From here we can live in a meditative existence. It empowers us. We make decisions based upon quiet reflection in a mindful way. We do not give in to a chaotic reaction. It gives us at least one moment of consideration,  This can make all the difference in the world. It helps us to make the most fundamental choice that we can make. This is the choice of how we choose to see things. From this ability to choose we can have lives of peace. Ask people like Wayne Dyer, Ram Dass and many more and they would likely tell you the same thing.

The practice of meditation is not new. There have been meditative conclaves from almost all religions and wisdom traditions for thousands of years. These practices include the Gregorian monks, the Sufi dervishes, the writer of  the Psalms,and the Vedic rishis. All have the same goal.  They were not really seeking to become people who meditate. What we are really seeking is to be free. We yearn to transcend our normal state of being. We seek equanimity and peace. Meditation is merely a tool. 

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There's a wonderful story about a spiritual teacher who was giving a lecture. He was getting very little reaction from the crowd. There was one little lady sitting up front. She had to be about ninety years old. She just kept nodding her head at various parts as he talked. You could tell that she understood perfectly what was being said. Today, he was teaching on meditation and how it changes our states of being. It is where we find the most divine part of ourselves.

Later, after the lecture, the teacher sought out the old lady. She did not seem like a person who normally would come to his lectures. They tended to be a bit younger and New-Age minded. He was simply amazed that someone like that could so identify with his teaching. Why did she get it so perfectly when no one else seemed to? How did this little old lady understand this in such an experiential way?  How did she know how to transcend her normal state of being? He looked into her eyes and asked her how she knew? She looked at him and simply said, "Well young man, you meditate, I crochet!" So we can broaden the concept pretty far on that basis. Everything can be meditative.

We exist in several states of being. There is  the observer state. There is the state processes what is being observed., Then there is the critic that evaluates what we observe. The more we identify with the part of ourselves that only observes, with its impartial view, we can begin to have the ability to be mindful about our whole lives.

The critical aspect of our being is clearly the most insidious. It is built upon our experience base and our process of socialization. When you look into the mirror you must ask, who am I  really? Are you what others tell you that you are? Do you live your own truth? This again, is a part of being mindfulness about your life. It helps us to find our way on the path. This is the part that the observer allows us to change our lives.

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While there are many methods for fostering a mindful awareness, most are comprised of practices that quiet the mind. For most people, a quiet mind is proceeded by a quiet body. Physical relaxation can be an important factor in reaching the meditative state of mind. A quiet mind helps us to not get swept away. A quiet mind helps us identify less with the experience and more with the one that experiences. As we begin to have a quieted mind, we can watch our thoughts and feelings. 

Perhaps this may be a good example. Try to imagine all of your thoughts as if they were leaves flowing down a stream. When we are meditative our thoughts pass by like the leaves going with the current. For a moment we acknowledge them. Then let them pass by. They no longer hold our awareness. This will allow us to see each thing for what it is. Now we can make the only choice that we have. This  is the choice about how we choose to see things.

The Buddhist have a saying, "There are many paths up the mountain", or sometimes, it is put as, "There are many paths to God".  In mindfulness training you may find that certain paths fit your needs better than others. For some people meditation methods such as watching yourself breathe works to foster a "present awareness". Others may find a simple stroll does the trick. Maybe a good bath puts you in that place where you can watch everything in the present moment. It really does not matter which path, school or technique that you choose if they work for you they will all lead to the same place.

This is a place of personal empowerment and peace. For one who is mindful has the power to do anything they want. We only have this moment. Yesterday is just merely a memory and tomorrow a dream. Right now at this moment, with the power of mindfulness behind you your life can be forever changed. Now you know, how to tickle the infanite, within. 

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Bipolar Insomnia

Bipolar Insomnia

Mental illness is often a leading cause for sleeplessness for those who have been diagnosed with a mental illness. For individuals with bipolar disorder sleep can be a major problem. In some cases without medical intervention people who suffer from this disease can be sleepless for days. For general practitioners, diagnosing a sleep disorder may not include consideration of bipolar disorder. This is particularly true in situations where medical history does not include the diagnosis for this disease or when a patient does not self-identify as being bipolar.

Bipolar disorder is estimated to affect from 2% to 7% of the people in the United States. It is further estimated that almost 10,000,000 people will develop the illness at some point during their lives. Bipolar disorder is often misdiagnosed because it can be confused with other diseases. Often people with mental illnesses have more than one diagnosable disease. For instance, if you are bipolar it is highly likely that you will have substance abuse issues, high-risk sexual behaviors, or other symptoms. Sometimes these symptoms can be very hard to differentiate. If you have sleep problems and are bipolar make sure that you tell your doctor. It will help significantly. Keeping your doctor informed can help you to find relief from symptoms sooner. It also becomes easier to find the proper treatment.

Sleep is a major factor in maintaining stability

For all individuals sleep is an important part of maintaining physical and mental well-being. There are various reasons that people have problems sleeping. Research shows that individuals who have bipolar disorder are at high risk for instability without appropriate sleep. Sleep is a basic component in managing the stability of this disease. Without proper cycles of sleep our bodies' basic biorhythms can be significantly disturbed. These biorhythms or "circadian rhythms" manage or contribute to not only our mental well-being but our physical well-being also. Sleeplessness is not the only problem. Too much sleep can also be a major factor of instability. It can contribute significantly to depressive cycles.

If you suffer from bipolar insomnia, it's important to take some basic steps that will help you to manage sleep. The steps can be called sleep hygiene. Sleep hygiene includes several factors:

• 1. Try to avoid napping. If you do need to nap limit napping to the early afternoon and for a short duration.
• 2. Cut down or avoid the use of caffeine entirely.
• 3. Limit your consumption of alcohol.
• 4. Regular exercise is important because it helps to limit factors like adrenaline and quiets the body. The quiet body helps to produce a quiet mind.
• 5. Meditation or relaxation methods can help significantly when patients have sleeplessness. Often this helps to attack the problems that are introduced by hypomania and mania.
• 6. A helpful tool to help you and your doctor understand your sleep situation is to record your sleep cycles and other pertinent information in a log book or journal.
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Treating Bipolar Insomnia

If you're experiencing bipolar insomnia, there are several ways that your doctor may choose to treat your illness. Often this will be through the use of medication. Medications such as Seroquel can help to induce sleep. This class of medicines is called atypical antipsychotics. These medicines can act in a powerful way to induce sleep. For some patients with bipolar insomnia traditional sleep medications like Lunesta or Ambienmay not work. Trazodone may also be used as an off-label treatment for insomnia. Trazodone is an older treatment for depression. Generally with people who have bipolar disorder antidepressants are not used. It can cause the bipolar individual to have a, "bipolar switch". This switch can cause a person to come out of depression and enter mania. Careful consultation with your doctor is recommended. For those with bipolar induced insomnia it is recommended that treatment should come from a properly trained psychiatrist.

Over-the-counter medications for sleep

Over-the-counter medications for sleep are generally formulated from antihistamine medications. Many of these medications are older drugs. These antihistamines tend to make people sleepy. This is a major factor in why antihistamine medications have been changed. Newer antihistamines do not generally stimulate sleep. Other over-the-counter medications or supplements may also contain ingredients such as Valerian root, melatonin, or other herbal central nervous system depressants. Bipolar insomnia may not respond to over-the-counter medications.

Finding solutions for bipolar insomnia

To find the right solution you may have to try several approaches. It also might require the use of more than one of these options at the same time to help the bipolar individual stabilize both their sleep and their lives.

Information for this article is based on research by the National Institute of Mental Health, the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, the New England Journal of Medicine, and the Mayo Clinic.

Can Changing Your Mind, Change Your Brain?

Can our brains change in structure over time? Do our brains re-wire itself based on what we experience? These are interesting questions. Scientists have wondered if our perceptions and experiences have the ability to change the physical makeup of our brains. In 1890, William James, published an article in The Principles of Psychology. There is growing evidence that changing your mind does change your brain.

In the 1970’s and 80’s, many tests were preformed to determine if changes in perception did have the ability to change the physical structure of the brain. Some of these tests were developed and implemented by Michael Merzenich, Jon Kaas, and Doug Rasmusson. These tests seemed to show that there is a strong reason to believe that your state of mind does change your brain. However, there are some scientists who are not certain that this is the case.

There are two main types of neuroplasticity. These are generally known as, “positive“ or “negative” plasticity. This means that our mind changes it’s wiring and either grows connections or disposes of connections depending on the circumstances. An example of negative plasticity occurs when pain or trauma changes the amount of neurotransmitters. These chemicals have a big impact on the brain. If the impact of these chemicals are strong enough they will change  the structure of the brain. Since 2005 research has continued to show that the the brains ability to change is quite rapid.

Richard Davidson, is a neuroscientist at the University of Wisconsin. He has led experiments in conjunction with the Dalai Lama to see if meditation can have an effecton the structure of the neuropathways. The research seems to indicate that meditation does affect both long and short-term restructuring of the brain. This is particularly true in areas that affect emotions such as anxiety, fear, depression, and anger.

brains! (Photo credit: cloois)

From this research it seems to be clear that how you see the world and how you experience the world does have the ability to affect the physical structure of your brain. In this case there is literally a connection between mind over matter. It’s important for us at all times to look at ourselves in the self compassionate and friendly light. Through this compassion and understanding weekend change some of the fundamental connections in our brain to promote our health and well-being. When we seek to change her mind it’s important to remember that we also change your brain. This changes our ability to adapt to the circumstances and experience around us. The ability to change our brains could be a substantial tool in the arsenal for those who have mental illness to find meaningful and lasting recovery.

Feed Your Head, Nutrients As A Treatment For Mental Illness

You Are What You Eat

There are difficulties when comparing different systems of medicine. For example, westernized medicine tends to look at things in terms of pathology and not particularly in terms of wellness. Other systems of medicine, such as traditional Chinese Medicine or Ayurveda tend to take a more proactive approach and could be considered systems of wellness and not merely systems in medicine. In the previous article it is suggested that these systems are very difficult to compare.

Western medical science relies heavily on prescription medications. These medications are often synthesized compounds that effect specific symptoms. Other systems of medicine also have a molecular basis. So there is a reasonable standard that we can use to compare these systems. These systems can be compared based on two factors, their organic chemical effect and the outcomes that they produce. For instance, if a prescription medication has side effects that are worse than the disease that they are meant to treat, they're more aptly to be described as a poison. On the other hand, in many cases once diseases have developed, these medications are highly effective at managing the symptoms if not the disease. In some cases chronic diseases such as mental illnesses may require medication for the remainder of the patient's life if their illness is severe enough.

Alternative systems tend to take a proactive approach to treating disease. These systems focus on prevention of disease and the mediation of the basic causes of disease. They tend to use whole foods nutrients and plant products to affect wellness. The molecular structure of these substances is often much more complex and complete than that specifically engineered prescription medication that we are used to. This molecular basis of analysis helps us to compare the systems of medicine.


During the 1930s a multidisciplined scientist, Linus Pauling, began to look at the molecular nature of various diseases. He found often that basic nutrients in the right combinations and dosages had a better chance of prevention of disease or at least remission of symptoms. There is a good body of research and documentation about use of these substances for people with psychiatric conditions.



In the Canadian province of Saskatchewan there was a long-term research program conducted based on the findings of Dr. Pauling, PhD. This research has become the basis of what is now known as the adrenochrome hypothesis. This hypothesis states that hydrogen peroxide in the presence of ferritin, or iron in the blood, contributes to the oxidization of the neurotransmitter adrenaline. Once oxidized the molecular structure of adrenochrome is very similar to the structure of mescaline. In patients with high levels of adrenochrome disassociative experiences and diseases such as schizophrenia are prevalent.



This hypothesis states that through the use of orthomolecular medicine, or the use of basic nutrients in the right dosages and application, can cure or control this disease. Further research along this line suggests that other psychological conditions might be significantly impacted by the application of basic nutrients.

In patients with schizophrenic diseases a variety of B vitamins and whole C vitamins has shown to have a significant impact on the disease. The vitamins that are involved are niacin, B6, B12, and vitamin C. Significant dosages of these basic nutrients helped to reduce the oxidizing effect on adrenaline and therefore produced significantly less adrenochrome.



Traditionally Western medicine does give a nod in the direction of the use of nutrients. It is said to be an important part of health. Often, because of the influence of the pharmaceutical industry, the primary use of nutrients as treatment for disease is considered quackery.



The evidence seens to show that patients reported less disturbing symptoms and many eventually were freed from symptoms entirely. For people like Dr. Abraham Hoffer, MD, Phd and his associates the evidence suggests that this form of treatment may contribute to a better quality of life for patients with schizophrenia. Dr. Hoffer in his research and interviews talks about the use of both synthetic pharmaceuticals and nutrients over a period of time to affect these changes. He does not advocate the immediate disposal of pharmaceutical medications in place of vitamin therapy. It would seem that he feels that all healing is a process.

In the documentary film, Feed Your Head, the adrenochrome hypothesis is discussed in great detail. Many patients in the film such as the actress, Margot Kidder, assembled together to thank these doctors for their work. Much of the material for this article comes from this movie. Another significant resource for the development of this article was derived from the information listed on the orthomolecular.org website.



For further information about the promise and practice of orthomolecular medicine please review both of these resources. While there are not many practitioners of orthomolecular medicine, they can be found. Of course, not every treatment is right for every patient. But for those who use orthomolecular medicine to prevent and treat disease the use of basic nutrients has changed their lives.



Orthomolecular medicine contributes to health on a much wider basis than just schizophrenic disease. Since the 1800s scientists have been working to understand a sentiment that computer engineers have known for a long time, if you put garbage into a system you get garbage out of the system. In the case of orthomolecular medicine it is fair to say you are what you eat, so if you have a mental illness, be sure to feed your head.

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One Way To Find Peace

This article is dedicated to Nancy Randolph, without her this could not have been written. She is one of my personal heroes. She works in Manitowoc, Wisconsin, at the Manitowoc County Human Services Department. She applied for the initial grant to start Painting Pathways Clubhouse. On behalf of the members and staff, thank you!!

Most of us can identify with a certain amount of suffering. Some are submerged in it all the time. It, suffering, is part of the human condition. Life can be hard sometimes. Fortunately, you can learn to grow. You can begin to move past much of the suffering. It can be hard to do so alone. We must look for teachers and companions who are willing to walk down the path with us for a while. Hopefully we will find this sort of mentor and friend. The caveat is that you have to actively seek out help and advice. This is a place where many falter. It is never easy to ask for help. But take the chance, it may just change your life. 

My life experiences gave me a pretty practical understanding of suffering. I began to see this going on in the lives of others also. I could identify with the terrible cost to the souls of those who suffer. That cost can easily spread to the friends and families around them. All of this has got me thinking. When I see someone who is suffering I just want them to know they are not alone. I want to help her. The question is how do we do it? 

I have already learned that the real magic happens when you can touch the person behind the trauma. It helps to establish a place of safe acceptance and compassion for that person. This demonstration of goodwill can dry up tears and encourage. To accomplish these things with people is a bit of an art. You have to be open to them, but not captivated by their crisis. You must be compassionate and decoupled from pity. This is manifested by two people talking openly and unmasked. Being open in this way is the real miracle that we experience. I get to see these events more often at this point in life and have become grateful in the process. Sometimes we can get caught up in the drama of others. The passions are intriguing. Will She? 

Won’t He? Will they have to operate?  Are you gonna go to jail? It is hard to not get caught up in the process and the drama. Many of these crisis's are heart wrenching. Our best role is that of gentle friend. What can we really tell them about their pain that they don’t already know? To hold their hand and cry with them may be the greatest human service you can provide.

You can get convinced that you must take action or the person will face peril. Thankfully humility is ubiquitous in the universe. It offers constant little reminders for those who choose to see them. Although we are occasional conduits of grace and good will, we are not the only source of grace that is available to others.

Jane & Eglinton (Photo credit: AshtonPal)

Life, in the face of our hubris, occasionally will show us an absolutely beautiful illustration of grace. This grace is demonstrated in simple, humble human interaction. It is a moment that is bigger than just that moment. It is a bond between two people. It is no different for you and me today. It is about us. At that moment there is a partnership that is built.  

The Buddha says that to gladden the mind, we should think of things of virtue. One of these moments of virtue has been in my remembrance always. As I watched the events transpire it gladdened my mind considerably. It taught me so much in just one moment.

I spend almost every day in a wonderful place called Painting Pathways Clubhouse. The clubhouse is a successful example of what makes a great community. It is the best that I have ever seen. Great passions and ideas are mediated into something truly impressive. Most of the people who make things happen and make decisions are the members. Members at a clubhouse are people who have a mental illness. It is clear that their mental illness does not prohibit accomplishment. The clubhouse is thriving because of the members. The staff would not be able to run the place on their own.

I have come to know and appreciate many new people in my time there. Most feel like adopting family to me at this point. But in this case, I met my friend Jane on a winter afternoon. She came into the clubhouse like many do. She was a bit confused and lacked confidence. She was a good person who really felt fear about almost everything. In the process of her life she lost a good job, her emotions, her ability to remember and all of her confidence. She was not sure if the clubhouse was right for her. What would she be forced to do? I think that I suggested trying to answer the phones. She broke out in a dead sweat and swore that there was no way that she could do that. She wasn’t sure if she can handle taking messages. 

I am not sure how it happens. She began to answer calls. There is a set of skills that someone has to master in order to operate the phones. She had already achieved more than she had expected to achieve. She found a place to sit. Other members and staff  worked side-by-side with her. She became part of the business unit at our club and answers the phone regularly now. A short training session was held so more people would know how to use the phone system.  They used my friend as the example receptionist. She did the job without a flaw.  It really touched me. “Do you see recovery is possible? Good for you, Jane! See, I knew you could do it.”, echoed through my thoughts. 

We went our separate ways for a while. I got involved in a few projects and saw Jane on occasion. We would say hello and pass. By that time I had gotten  pretty used to helping and supporting Jane. Often, I have been someone who she could talk to. One day I walked in and saw dear Jane in a state that I had seen before. This was not a posture of happiness, it was a crisis.

Boston in the View (Photo credit: Werner Kunz)

Instantly I saw the eye to eye contact she had with one of the staff members. The staff member showed incredible compassion and a face of hopeful acceptance. She cared for Jane in such a tender and human way. I captured an image of it. I went about my business in the usual way. She was getting what she needed. I was confident that she was in good hands. These two wonderful women will be etched in my memory as a moment of virtue and it still gladdens my mind. Like the song says, “We don’t always get what we want, but we get what we need”. 

Self-Compassion In Mental Health Recovery

Self-Compassion?

In our effort to find recovery for ourselves there are some challenges that are significant. It is normal that our experience up to this point has been filled with things that make us afraid. Fear can come from many places. Many of these fears make it hard for us to accept ourselves and our challenges.  This type of fear can make it very hard to accept things as they are. They can make it difficult to accept ourselves in a loving manner.  Without loving ourselves in this way it is likely that we will never make progress in our recovery.   Compassion for yourself will allow you to see your disease openly. It helps to remove the significant barriers that impacts our ability to change. With the power of a compassionate point of view we can look at those things that have hurt us. It helps us to accept that we have a disease. It also helps you to see the impact of your disease on those around you in a new way.

In the course of my mental illness I came to the realization that having a mental illness strikes deeper than just the mind. It becomes an affliction of the heart. The years of suffering dig deep within us and can eat us alive. These wounds are so tender that without the mechanisms of compassion we are not able to grow. Abraham Maslow [1968], that emotional maturity requires a mind that does not judge, is self-forgiving and includes a loving acceptance of self. Sometimes this can seem difficult to view ourselves in this light.

In doing my research I looked to see what various publications had to say about self-compassion and how one might empower them to accept themselves in this light. I would love to give you a simple light switch method which enables you to instantly be self-compassionate. Self-compassion is a lifelong process. There are many days with pain that cloud this perspective. We find that as we watch our pain then we start to understand it, the pain becomes instructive. This instruction is part of our learning in self-compassion. To be able to openly look at those things that imbibe us with suffering becomes transmuted into the power to overcome the death grip that is associated with our pain. It can free us from ruminating in pity for ourselves and can free our body, mind, and spirit.

What is self-compassion? The literal definition of compassion means “to suffer with”. Having compassion for yourself means that you have to recognize your suffering. You must look at this suffering in a kind and loving way. We have to allow ourselves to look at our disease openly and honestly. Our egos have been trained by our experience. Often this experience is derived from our process of becoming a social being. We get used to hearing that outside voice that tells us that we might not be, "good enough in another person’s point of view. We tend to believe whatever these outside voices tell us and take this to heart. This guilt, shame, blame and condemnation will kill our sense of self worth.

Self-compassion is a concept that is deeper than just your self-esteem. A bully can feel pretty good about beating someone else up. A person may think so highly of themselves that they can see nothing but their wants and desires. To make progress in recovery you must be able to see yourself clearly. You must forgo the judgments and condemnation. View yourself in a warm an accepting manner. We have to accept that in this process of recovery there will be bad days. There will be pain. Self-compassion will help us to accept the way things are now and give us perspective on how to change for the future.

According to Karen Neff PhD, an associate professor at the University of Texas at Austin, self-compassion has three main components. The first part is self-kindness. Self-kindness allows us to look at our failings and suffering with a gentle perspective and helps us to understand that bad things happen to good people. With self-kindness we are equipped to deal with the self-hatred and judgment we face. We can allow ourselves both the mistakes of the past and those of the present.

The next part of self-compassion is to realize our common humanity. All of us have had struggles, suffering and pain. When you realize that everyone experiences these things it helps us to understand not only that it is ok for us to have issues but that others around us may have some too. It breaks down the feeling that you are the only one with a problem. It helps us to be less isolated in our pain. We find that we are less judgemental about ourselves and others.

Self-compassion requires that we take a balanced look at our thoughts and emotions. This shows us the need to foster a place within ourselves that is aware of our thoughts and behaviors. To take this balanced approach we must develop our minds. This development of our minds may be called mindfulness. When we work to be aware of our thoughts and feelings we can deal with them openly. This makes perfect sense. If we do not realize that there are fears and judgments in our deepest thoughts we can do nothing to deal with them. They control us as compared to us controlling them. Even if we cannot control these feelings and thoughts being mindful of them and patient will in time lead to acceptance.

I encourage you to spend 5 minutes, two times per day, to sit quietly and watch your thoughts. While you look at your thoughts choose to look at yourself in a tender light. Be kind to yourself. Soon you will begin to notice that you are developing the person behind the disease. Once you can do this you are on your way to recovery.

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A Practical Approach To Self-Compassion Continued

So far in this series of articles about self-compassion we have examined several key concepts. For you to foster self-compassion we discovered that:

• 1. We must actively hold ourselves in a tender and loving manner to come into greater acceptance of yourself you must be able to observe your deepest thoughts and feelings
• 
  
• 2. A tool that you can use to see these things clearly asks us to take five minutes at least two 
• times per day a to still our bodies and minds
• 
  
• 3. When we do quiet ourselves we can begin to see ourselves in a permissive state. From this we build the ability to respond in a thoughtful manner to our situation. This ability to respond gives us greater power to change then the thoughtless reactions that is often the norm in life.

Inscribed above Gandhi's tomb is, "Think of the poorest person you've ever seen and ask whether your next act will be of any use." This poverty could be related to many facets of our life. In our own lives many have experienced poverty in our feelings, poverty of acceptance, poverty in our isolation, as well as financial poverty. From time to time we all may suffer a life filled with poverty of many types. These unmet needs can often cause us to feel isolated and alone. It would seem that we are the only people who carry our burdens. We need to begin to remember that we are not the only people to experience loss and isolation. When we begin to see how common that our experience is we can start to feel less isolated. It helps to know that you are not alone even in your pain and suffering. That pain might be tailored to our experience but we are not the only person who bares sickness, sorrow, disease and pain.

The ancient Pali word, "metta" means loving-kindness, friendliness, goodwill, benevolence, fellowship, amity, concord, inoffensiveness and non-violence. It usually used to indicate an approximate means by which we can have a strong desire to see all beings experience peace and happiness. The inclusive attributes helps us to connect with both the joys and suffering of ourselves and others. This can be practiced as a "metta meditation".

For our purposes meditation in this instance means to quietly sit and reflect on thoughts of peace and happiness for all. This includes ourselves. Take a moment, close your eyes and imagine that as far as you can see there are beings of every race, creed and color. Think about a memory where you feel loving and kind. Concentrate on not just the event but the actual feelings involved. You may notice that you have actual physical feelings associated with this. When this feeling is clear enough simply transfer those feelings to all beings. Imagine that this feeling is like a bright light shining in your heart. Let this light of love and compassion spread to cover everyone and everything.

This method helps us to build a rapport with something greater than ourselves. By this process you can gain a sense that you are far from alone. You begin to see your inter-connected nature. As you start to feel this connection you realize that you are experiencing many of the same things that those around you do. This can lead to acceptance that to have pain is a normal part of life and that others share in your burden. Once you come to the conclusion that others experience pain and suffering you can begin understand that your pain is reasonable. It is empowering to see that others move on in their pain and that you can too.

Walk With Leisure Through The Park

Sometimes we just have to stop, and sniff the roses.

I have made a social agreement with myself 
To walk with leisure through the park
While on my way to my many destinations
To pause in appreciation for all of life
To experience the peace of the trees
To learn from the birds as they sing
To remember to cherish all about me

This contract with myself is not a cannon or restrictive covenant
It is but a way to inbibe the fullness and richness of life
It inhabits within a sense of wellness and whole-being

Live simply,
Take in the moments of your life and..
Walk with leisure through the park

A Practical Approach To Self-Compassion

Image via Wikipedia

Self-compassion is your greatest source of strength. In my previous article, Self-compassion In Mental Health Recovery, I talked about becoming compassionate with yourself is a life long process. It stands to reason that the process has to start somewhere. The trick, if there is one, comes in finding the methods and tools that are exclusive to your needs. For self-compassion to rise in you, a very personal approach must be adopted. This is true not only for developing the skills of compassion but all work that you do in personal development. The fortunate part of this process is that once you do get methods and tools that work for you personal growth starts to build its own momentum.

I recommend in my work with others to start very simply. I suggest that you start by simply watching your intentions at least twice a day for 5 minutes. The reason that I suggest that you start with 5 minutes is because it can be hard in our busy lives to grant ourselves any time for personal work. It is easier to build a regular habit of reflection if we are not defeated at the beginning by not having sufficient time to do the work. It also contributes to fostering the first skill that we need to successfully realize growth. This skill is learning to quiet your mind.

The Buddhist call the unquieted mind the, "Monkey Mind". It is full of chatty frenetic conversation about everything. Will she like me? Should I check my email? What should I do for dinner? What if my boss does not like that report? It is involved in almost endless consideration of everything accept peace and quiet. It gets lost in every moment but now. It ruminates about the past and speculates about the future. It does this in a less than conscience manner. To be compassionate with yourself you have to be rooted in the the present moment. Life is a series of many moments. The only time that you can do anything is right now. If you can not focus on right now you are defeated in the process.

So how do we begin to quiet the mind? To quiet the mind it is helpful to quiet the body. Find a place where you can be relaxed and are not likely to be disturbed. Turn off the phone. You must give yourself the permission to take the time that you need. We afford ourselves other needs that we have. Even really busy people must eat. Does being quiet rate as a need like eating? My simple answer is that to be happier and more self-compassionate it does. This permissive state is an example of self-kindness. We need to start allowing ourselves the things thats are required for our mental and spiritual health.

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Once you have found a place where you can be physically relaxed the process of quieting the body can be as simple as sitting still. This again can be a challenge. Be gentle with yourself at this time. If you need to scratch yourself, shift your weight it is ok to do so. Just do so in a relaxed state and return your body to rest. Don't worry if you have a hard time. This is a skill and any skill takes some time to develop. If you find that you have more physical angst you may find it necessary to add some breathing techniques. We want to encourage ourselves to breathe in a relaxed manner. Perhaps you may want to start off with slowly inhaling deeply. Fill your lungs completely. Breathe from your stomach.


Try not to let your shoulders rise with your inhalation. If you let your shoulders rise you are adding stress to your body not relaxing it. This tends to stress the shoulders, neck, back, and head. After you have inhaled, pause for a two count, then slowly and completely exhale. Do this several times. As you begin to take full breaths in and out, in a slow and steady manner you can begin to let your breath settle down to let it do its own thing. Our breathing is interesting in that it can be both voluntary and involuntary. When you are relaxed your breathing will be also.


Okay so what if you find it hard to sit for 5 minutes in this way, are you prevented from quieting the body and the mind? Certainly not. Perhaps going for a nice stroll will help you to relax. What we are trying to foster is something that Herbert Benson, M.D. and others refer to as the, "Relaxation Response". Simply, this is the response that our body and minds have when stilled. This response is key to progress in building the skill of a quieted mind.

So now that you have begun to quiet your mind you are on the road to finding compassion for yourself. In my next article I will explore more steps along the path to your personal self-compassion.

The Road Less Traveled - Improving Our Mental Health - Improving Our Life

The Road Less Traveled - Improving Our Mental Health - Improving Our Life

For those who are new to mental health problems and for those who have a long history, it is important to look at mental illness for what it really is. It is a disease. Something that we need to deal with. The truth is that; "having a mental illness does not make us less of a person or morally deficient." Because of this fear and judgement, we have lives of guilt ridden suffering. You can let go of all the judgement. It is simply unproductive. It has nothing to do with why you were suffering. We misunderstand why we continue to suffer. But we will cover more on that later, so let us concentrate on what you can do now.

The regret you held about the past was, in the past. Leave it there. As Jesus said," Let the dead bury the dead." Do you realize that reflecting on the past is still just your current experience of it? It is not actually the past. It is what you think and feel about that past right at this moment. Research into memory shows that every time we recall a memory, it becomes modified. It is modified by the thoughts and judgements that are made about that memory, at that time. In fact, when it happens enough it can change the structure of the brain. You have to ask yourself what your real situation is now.

In this moment, how do you see yourself? You can choose to see that you are a person that has some problems that have to be dealt with. Some things you will have to do for yourself. For some things, you will need others. Keep at it, recovery can happen. For recovery to happen we must look at mental disease differently. From my experience it takes a holistic approach. You must treat the entire being; body, mind, and spirit.

You need to find a fundamental acceptance of yourself. This must be done completely, honestly, and factually. Try to do this consistently. Take it on as a way of life. Use self-compassion to let you see yourself clearly. Try to be like Gandhi and be truthful with yourself in each moment. This acceptance is key. It is what enables you. It is the first stepping stone on the pathway to a meaningful life.

Perspectives On Perception

This should not really be very surprising. Some of our oldest wisdom traditions have tried to say this for a really long time. One of these nuggets of wisdom is a saying, "To an expert few things are possible, and to a novice all things are possible". If you suffer, I suggest you become the novice. Use this moment to begin to see things differently, openly, and compassionately. Make all things possible. Take nothing off of the table. If you open your mind and allow for a different perspective you can change your life.

There is another analogy that you may be more familiar with, "some people see things through rose-colored glasses". To these people things seem to be better than perhaps they are. At very least they choose to limit how they see things. For a long time I was not able to accept that I had a mental issue or that it was bipolar disorder. It did not fit with the egoic picture that I had about myself. I was sick and kept suffering because I could not accept why. I misunderstood, like many people, about what it means to have a mental illness. It may be hard , but you can do it.

This fear, is the fear of the unknown. Alfred Hitchcock understood the power of this clearly. Often what you did not see on the screen was the most impactful. We cannot believe that peace can exist. Death may seem imminent. If you are fortunate it will lead to egoic submission. A death to the part of us that held us in suffering.

Sadly too many do not survive this process and for them mental illness is a death sentence. As you go ahead down the path toward recovery you will find that how you see things has a fundamental impact on your entire life. When you realize that you can choose how you feel about anything you begin to live free. Actually there is nothing that prevents you from being free now. It may be a bit hard to accept at this point in the journey. This is fine. Frankly, this is a lesson that I am constantly reminded of after years of practice.

As our relationships deteriorate we begin to lose many of the basic building blocks required to have healthy and stable lives. As jobs are lost and incomes falter we face the possibility of losing such things as, housing, access to medical care (a vastly important part of staying stable), we may also lose the ability to even acquire food, and for many their liberty:Abraham Maslow a professor of psychology did a study and published a paper in 1943 A Theory of Human Motivation. In this work Maslow suggests that a human must have somebasic needs met to become what he called a “self actualized being”.

These needs are generally broken down into five levels. Four levels are considered as what are necessary for base psychological needs. These are often called “d-needs” or “deficiency needs”. The fifth level is where human psychological growth is possible. To Maslow this is where people like Einstein, Gandhi, and the Dali Lama hang out. All though these people are exceptional examples: growth, understanding and well-being are available to all of us. We can receive nourishment and nourish others when we have our basic needs met. When we begin to understand our individualized needs, we begin to find our path toward recovery.Carl Rogers was a prominent professor of psychology. He taught at several leading universities. He states, "Psychotherapy does not supply motivation for such development or growth (the personality and behavior). This seems inherent in the organism, just as we find a similar tendency in the human animal to develop and mature physically, providing minimally satisfactory conditions are provided.” There is a part of you that given a chance will rise to the surface and grow. In this whole process you are the one who will have to do the work. Your doctors, therapists, mentors, spiritual advisers family, and friends cannot do what has to be done. Mostly they cannot do it because the work that has to be done is on the inside of you. I think that it would be fair to say that Dr Rogers builds on the concepts that Maslow suggests: given enough support of basic needs that people are capable of growing psychologically.

Maybe? One possible key to happiness

Awareness is key to the door of a healthy and happy life. Let me quickly share with you the difference between pain and suffering. Simply stated, you are suffering if the only thing that you are is pain. When you are in pain, even significant pain, and you are still aware of things that give reason around pain you are just in pain. You are what you identify with. One example that I can use is stubbing your toe. As an adult we understand what has happened, we understand that although it is very painful it will go away. An infant however might have no way to put the pain into context. It seems come out of nowhere. Nothing else exists or is perceived. You could think of suffering like being swallowed up by a wave. There is nothing but oppressive water. No way for you to catch a breath. You are confused about which way is up. How do you survive? You are caught reacting not responding. Responding at least brings you the power of choice. Imagine the suffering that occurs the moment we are first hungry as an infant. You have absolutely no experience with anything, how do you cope? You suffer. As this happens in cycles of hunger and feeding and we learn that this is likely to continue, this suffering changes to a class of pain or annoyance. You may recognize this at work in your own experience with mental illness. You are so overwhelmed that you cannot even name the specific pains in your life. It is faceless pain. It is suffering. It is not merely sad or angry it is blurry and very hard to live through. This is where good cognitive support like talk therapy may help. Often clients will come in and say that they are miserable and feel that they can't express the core issues. They can only speak of incomprehensible pain. There is no clarity only confusion. A good therapist will help you contextualize things. As you gain perspective you can naturally move from suffering to a place of peace. This is the basis for gaining perspective on your life and to start you have to learn to see things more broadly, compassionately, and lovingly. This open awareness will arm you to grow as a person and put you well along on a recovery path.

ENTER COMPASSION AS A PATH TO HEALING

Basic human compassion

When we learn about the experiences of people who are color blind; we learn that they do not see red or green correctly. Because of this, they may have a harder time recognizing signs that forecast danger. This is because many of these signs are colored red. These people must rely on something else. Perhaps they will use words or pictures to understand the warning. There are some who do not walk. They have to find some path that they can travel. Someone who is crippled by their fears, frustrations, sicknesses, sorrows, and diseases must have the compassion on themselves, to allow for their needs for growth. We must adapt our lives. People with other challenging conditions find ways to live well. It is a struggle. I will not lie to you about that. But, it can be done. We have to change how we look at everything.

I have, like many, experienced suffering in my life. This has led me to a mission of sorts. I just want people that suffer to know that they are not alone and there is hope. So, I offer perspectives and resources that have helped me to move through my suffering to acceptance and recovery. I am still learning. Learning is a life-long process. Based now, on years of experience, I believe that I do not have to suffer. I know however that there will still be pain at times in life. Hopefully what I am writing can open a few doors for you to consider and to reassure you that it is OK to have a disease. It is not OK to stay in suffering because of it and you can recover! But you must contemplate the path that you wish to take. There is a joke that asks, "How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?” The answer, "one, but the light bulb really has to want to change." While this is sort of funny, the truth is that you have to be ready to change.

Just wanting a change in life may not be enough. For me I had to have nothing left to consider. Naturally, it is hard for us to openly face our fears. But when it happens, happens on the inside of you, there will be nothing left in that space to hold you in suffering. That part that held you in suffering is dead. This place can be scary. We hold so tightly to stay in control. We often feel that the suffering that we know is a far less threatening life than the vague promise of a life of equanimity. We hold our suffering jealously. We do not know what life would be like, or could be like. We dare not believe that there is hope. But when we do let go however, we are most likely find peace.

Most of my life I have been pretty clever. I could see how many things worked. Actually, I could not stop noticing all sorts of things. Things abstract, things concrete, things philosophic, and things emotional were rushing through me. Each moment was intense. Often I did not have the ability to keep up with this stimulus. Like a boat being capsized by a wave, this torrent of thoughts captured me. It swallowed me up and became my identity. I could no longer see the difference between the suffering and who I really was. In my mind I was a bad person, a disappointment, and because I could not pay attention to things that others demanded of me a failure.

Because I was clever I was expected to achieve many things. Because of my emotions and the focus on my dramas I rarely did. I was told often and in many ways that I was a disappointment. Teachers, my mother, father, and the world at large reinforced this message. I saw myself as a "bad person". This added fuel to the fire of my suffering. This is too often the case for us. One of the core issues that people with mental illnesses face is the breakdown of important relationships. Parents give up flabbergasted with outrageous or incomprehensible behavior. Teachers over taxed recognize issues but can’t deal with them. Employers tired of the deficiencies that they see fire us. Husbands and wives part with hurt and distrust. These people, many with their own suffering and pain, simply are not equipped to either understand or support us. Can you blame them really?

Some numbers to consider

The Bureau of Justice statistics reports that says 61% of state prisoners have a mental illness, jails have a rate of 41% of inmates with mental illness. In general our population has about 5% of people who have diagnosable severe mental illnesses in any given year. It is clear that mental illness needs to dealt with. So what are the fundamental needs that we? How can we prevent being one of those jail or prison inmates.

The fall, continued...

So far my experience of being bipolar is concurrent with Maslow’s assertions. In my life much of the supporting relationships were lost. I was divorced, lost jobs, lost housing, lost my health, was jailed for not being able to pay child support, and as a result I was spiraling ever downward. One thing that I have learned is that I was not a bad person for not being able to cope and neither are you. I did not see a way how to deal with this disruption of my basic needs that are due to a bio-chemical and psychological problem. Under these circumstances anyone has a significant probability for failure and misery. Those who judge people harshly in this light are perhaps not considering things with good reasoning. Maslow suggests that, “anyone who attempts to make an emergency picture into a typical one and who will measure all of man's goals and desires by his [her] behavior during extreme physiological deprivation, is certainly blind to many things". Simply, a person in panic is likely to act irrationally. This has nothing to do with judgment of whether they are good or bad. This is true for ourselves and those that look upon us and attach a stigma because of our illness. It also illustrates further why those with a mental illness fail. While in the throes of our struggle to live we are least capable of doing so. We are seen as faltering on our responsibilities. Society expects us to do our part and take care of our business and it is actually reasonable for them to do so. Though there may be some things we cannot do ourselves, there is nothing we can't get done. With resolve, an open heart, and willingness to learn we can be responsible and apply what we can do. We can work with our medical practitioners to find the right medication. We can find cognitive support. We can find methods to deal the challenges as they come. Being responsible is in how we respond to our abilities. Take leadership in your recovery. You have to take the initiative to find the tools and support that work for you. There are many options for finding the care that best serves your needs. This may not be limited to specific medications or therapies. A good relationship with a therapist, a good diet, regular exercise, spiritual practice, and the establishment of meaningful relationships do not necessarily find you. You must be determined to find these things. Without your determination you will not see results in recovery.

Build the person behind the disease

This work by Dr Rogers is now not practiced widely. This is perhaps due more to the practice of his theories than the principals themselves. His thesis that you must develop the person behind the disease simply makes sense to me on the most human level. This is where psychology and the needs of the soul meet. It is the place where I do my work with others. The key to this working is that it must be genuine. You can’t play this. You must be open also. Not to getting caught in the drama but remaining open enough to always see the person beyond the behaviors. You do not have to support destructive behaviors. If you are able to build a relationship with someone on this basis it is far less threatening for you to tell them how you feel about it. I am sure it is heresy to suggest that this simple and humble view is one of friendship. This may feel perilous for many practitioners. To do this you have to be very open. They may fear involvement in your drama as much as you do. I have seen this many times. This was a significant trap for me. I realized that most of the practitioners that I have experienced could not go to this level. Though I have found this to be the case often, I do not condemn them. They after all deserve the same human consideration that I am talking about. They too have their own fears, frustrations, doubts and pain. I have though found some very notable exceptions. My appreciation for the work of Carl Rogers is due to one such practitioner. He demonstrates this in his practice and for that I am grateful.

Establishment of the person is of paramount importance. Personhood is not merely the sum of one’s social roles; it is not merely any label that you may affix to yourself. It is broader than that. It is a matter that starts at the heart. It is the living essence that we all share. With time and inquiry you can learn to let the person in you shine. As we begin to move our awareness from being saturated by our dilemma we become less caught and more free. To do this it helps us to perhaps listen to the wisdom of the Buddha. Buddhism if nothing else is an exquisite form of psychology. Buddha says that the reason we suffer is because of our attachments. For example we may believe the only way that we can be happy is if we have a particular car, that certain job, that special relationship, that anything. The problem with this is that these things are in time and time at the very core of time's definition is change. It is also relative. Neither of these things allows us to keep those things that are external to us. Cars breakdown, jobs are lost, people pass in and out our lives. To believe that we have any real control other than how we choose to see these things is pure deception, at least in this context.

In China there is a story about a farmer. One day, this farmer is out in his field tending to his duties. He notices that his horse has strayed from his farm. His neighbors tell him how unfortunate this is and he remarks, “Maybe”. The next day the farmer heads out to work and sees that the horse has returned along with 7 others and the neighbors say that this is fortunate. Once again the farmer simply intones, “Maybe”. During the next day the farmer’s only son is working to tame the new horses and is thrown, breaking his leg. The neighbors of course feel that this is unfortunate and again the farmer says, “Maybe”. Soon conscription officers arrive. They tell the farmer to give them his son so he may be drafted into the army. The farmer shows them that he has a broken leg and that he is of no use to them. They agree and let him pass. For this the neighbors rejoice and comment on the farmer’s good fortune and at this the farmer merely suggests, “Maybe”. The judgments that we make about good and bad are what hold us. These judgments of good and bad are based on the context that we put them in. For the farmer good or bad judgments are arbitrary. In the beginning of the story his loss seems to be unfortunate. In the end our friend the farmer gains more horses and gets to keep his son from the army. In it's isolated state the loss of the horse may have seemed to be a bad thing. In the end it may have saved his son. Our attachment to the belief that we have to feel bad will kill us. I do want to be clear about judging good and bad. I am not saying that there is no morality. I am saying the why of people acting in immoral ways is far more likely due to a person who sees that he/she is bad before they acted that way. If you see yourself as bad you are bad. As I said throughout this chapter you can start now on a path of recovery. Please do not be attached to the belief that there is no hope. Have the compassion on yourself to release your fears and judgments. Willingness to accept yourself starts this new journey. Once you have this open place your life will never be the same. In life I will tell you that there may still be pain. You do not have to suffer.

Where do you start on the path to recovery?

Well if at this point you are in an unsafe place or have emergency needs get them taken care of. If you are really bad off go to an emergency room or call the police. I have been in county run hospitals. I have been in private hospitals. To be honest it was not always pleasant. They all have one positive attribute. I am still alive because of them. The Buddhists will tell you that every step that you take in life is as valuable as the rest. You may feel low at this point but it can be the start of getting better. I will talk more about various resources later. Remember what Maslow told us about d-needs. If you do not have basic safety in life it will be hard to move on.

The establishment of compassion for self is where the healing begins and will ever continue. Without this you will not have a mechanism for changes at the most basic levels of this process. Your ego has built in defenses against changes and is an interesting challenge to the process. The ego tends to trust it’s self. This is true even if its perspective has nothing to do with the truth. It trusts the good/bad judgments that it has made based on its experiences. As I suggested in the previous chapter experiences that are based in suffering may occlude the truth considerably. It can be very hard to accept that your suffering may be due to a disability. Our egos do not want to except blame for a disease because our minds have the belief that we are less of a person because of it. I remember once telling a person that I felt that I was insane. She said that it was an understandable under the circumstances but that it was not ok to stay that way. In other words it was alright to have a mental illness. It was an issue of biology and some horrible experiences. I was not a deficient person but like any other illness it has to be treated. A good quality of life is available with a prudent approach that is right for you. Her words somehow got through to me. No one had ever put it to me so clearly. No one had communicated so simply. No one else had made it OK to have a problem. No one who gave me hope that it was manageable. There was no one who helped me to see that there was no fault in being me. Being bipolar is simply one aspect of me that requires attention and consideration. Heck from time to time we get haircuts. Again this is an aspect of us that needs which needs attention. It is nothing more. Obviously being bipolar is often more impactful to our lives but still means nothing more than we need to take care of ourselves.